"My husband has been unfaithful. What should I do?"

So, your spouse has been unfaithful. Are you sure? If so, and you want to try and make it work that is your choice. Many marriages that have gone wrong have been saved, and the offending spouse forgiven. Pastoral care and marriage counseling is highly suggested. However, whatever the case, plan your strategy and confront them and give them an ultimatum. Either they shape up — which means they stop their foolishness, immediately; or ship out. You make sure you don't leave; make them leave, even if you have to get a restraining order. You and the children (if there are any) deserve a decent place to live! Above all, don't let them string you along. They have already proven that they are a liar and a cheat, and don't expect them to act any differently unless they honestly change. Crocodile tears are not acceptable, either. Make them prove it, and let them know in no uncertain terms that you will be checking up on them.

Why do I say this? Because you are taking a big chance sleeping with someone who is sleeping with someone else. God only knows the disease that they may bring home. For, as a matter of fact, you will be sleeping with everyone that their partner has slept with in reality. Think of that! It could extrapolate out into the hundreds. With AIDS and STDs and all going around the way it is these days, you are taking a big chance! That's for sure.

Now, you have a Scriptural right to divorce them, if you wish. Here is what Jesus said:

Matt. 5: 31"It has been said, 'Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.'[f] 32But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery." (Of course, this refers to both husband and wife)

Now, I have a whole lot of advice I could give, but let me sum it up by saying what ever you do, make sure you do not drag the kids (if you have any) through the mud with you. Make it as civil as possible; but hold your grounds.

There is hardly anything any lower than an adulterer; however, God does forgive, and if we have the grace, so should we. Forgiveness, however, does not mean that we remain naive.

Forgiveness, remember, requires repentance on their part. You can not forgive someone that does not want forgiveness. They may want you to overlook it, but may not feel sorry, except for the fact that they got caught. So, be careful not to get sucked into a false “I am so sorry” story.

There are a couple of other suggestions that I have:

1. Pray for him and the other lady/ladies.

2. Make sure that you have also repented of any sins in your life, also.

During the meantime, may I suggest that you read the following?

Marriage and the Home (To access just click on the title, left)

My prayers are with you!